Best Friends

This week a new girl started in K's class.

That's right. A girl. 

Her own age.

Who shares common interests.

In all the programs we toured, we saw one girl K's age, but unfortunately that particular program wasn't a good fit. I would be lying if I said I didn't consider trying it out just so she could have a friend, though.

This new girl visited K's school twice, and I held my breath waiting to hear if she would become a student. When I received an email confirming her acceptance (the school sends up a heads up whenever a new child joins a class), I was elated.

When I had spoken to K about the possibility of this girl being in her class, she told me they would be best friends, and she would buy one of those best friend necklaces she saw at the mall. She was so earnest and matter-of-fact about it. Her innocence in how friendships are formed and kept is something I love about her, but the potential for heartbreak is not lost on me.

Yes, K and this new girl like some of the same things, like unicorns, and My Little Pony. But, this is also a special education school, and all kids come with a certain amount of trauma, or bad experiences, from previous placements. In her mind, K had already decided that they will be BFF's (best friends forever), and I hope she isn't disappointed. What she knows about friendship, in general, she has learned mostly from television shows. They are how she planned her first real sleepover, and they are how she has formed views on friendship. Mix those expectations with the expectation that everything will be immediate, and I worry what might happen. Especially if the new girl has a lot to work through, and isn't up for the instant BFF status K desires.

I am trying to stay positive, though. Even though these are two girls with a myriad of challenges, they absolutely can forge a path to true friendship. At the core, they are 10 year old girls (the new girl might be a year younger), and I always wants to have the same expectations I would for any 10 year old. Why not? Maybe things will look a bit different for them, but I respect my daughter enough to not baby her, or just assume things won't work out. I never want to underestimate anyone based on diagnosis, and I know there's always more than meets the eye. They both deserve to finally be accepted, feel safe, loved, and feel worthy of that BFF necklace.

Below are lyrics to a song I performed with 2 friends in an elementary school talent show :) 

BEST FRIENDS 

Best friends should be together, 
That’s how it ought to be, 
So let’s pretend I’m part of you, 
And you are part of me. 

If I were a little shoe, 
I could be your heel, 
If I were a little pig, 
I could be your squeal. 

If I were a little peach, 
I could be the fuzz 
If I were a bumble bee, 
I could be your buzz. 

Best friends should be together, 
That’s how it ought to be, 
So let’s pretend I’m part of you, 
And you are part of me. 

If I were an elephant, 
I could be your trunk, 
If I were a chocolate cake, 
I would be a hunk. 

If I were a picture, 
I would be your frame, 
But if I were nothing, 
I’d like you just the same. 

Best friends should be together, 
That’s how it ought to be, 
So let’s pretend I’m part of you, 
And you are part of me.